RHONJ Recap: Episode 3

Happy Tuesday, kids! I'm here to talk about this week's episode of RHONJ. If that's not your thing, check back later for my Two Truths & a Lie link up post.

Ya got that? Let's begin.

If Lauren's weight is going to be a storyline on this season, I'm going to stop watching the show. Of course she lost 5 pounds - she isn't eating anything! Oh, and the size 8 comment - don't think that went unnoticed. She addressed these comments in some tweets yesterday:

Read from the bottom, up...
I kind of really wanted to smack her when she repeatedly said, "I want to be rich!" LAUREN! You are fucking rich! Her "make-up bar", whatever the hell that is, just opened and I HIGHLY doubt she started her own business without a little help from mommy and daddy. Or, who knows, maybe Vito makes bank at the deli.

Seeing all of those kids running around had me confused; was I watching RHONJ or Jersey Shore, season 17, with Snooki's kid? Either way, I'm with Rosie. I'd need a drink and I'd probably start smoking again if I had to deal with all of those kids - besides Milania, who is awesome and tweeted this:

Let's talk about the fight, shall we? Did anyone happen to catch WWHL after the show and see the video Andy made of Melissa and Teresa's hand motions? I can't say much, I'm Italian and talk with my hands a lot - especially my middle finger.

I'm definitely Team Melissa these days, and found myself nodding my head (and throwing my hands around) in agreement with everything she said. If Teresa is pissed because of something her brother said, she should talk to him about it, not turn around and accuse Melissa of being a cheater. That's whack, Tre - WHACK.

Teresa needs to get over it and accept that her husband was in JAIL. I get it, I've seen the Godfather and Goodfellas; old school Italians do refer to it as "going away." But c'mon, Teresa - you sold this story to US Weekly, and you're on a reality TV show, just say "jail" - okay? Maybe she can't pronounce it.

You guys, we need to address the real problem...

...someone needs to sit Jacqueline and Kim D. down and tell them to stop having work done on their faces.

Or, in Jacqueline's case - start having work done on her neck.

Check back next week for a guest post recap of episode 4!