My Truth Revealed and a Little RHONY Recap

You guys, I'm not a cheater.

Well, not a physical cheater. I've been emotionally cheating with Don Draper up and down Madison Avenue circa 1963 for the past couple of weeks. I can't stop myself. I'm an emotionally cheating whore.

#3 was the lie.

Honestly, I've never even dated a guy that had a brother. Only sisters. And I'm not a lesbian.

I did leave my number for a waiter. He did call. It was one blissful summer.

I did steal Sam's boyfriend. She still loves me. He's crazy. It all works out in the end.

Thanks for playing along!

Moving on. Let's talk about RHONY, shall we? I live in New York; not the city. I like to think that Bravo enjoys finding the ugliest women in NYC to be on this show. Seriously, what does the casting call say for this show? Tall, rich, and busted? I think so. 

Actually, LuAnn is pretty, but she has a man voice. So does her daughter. Woof.

Let's break these bitches down, okay?

I have always thought Ramona was crazy. Now that she's sporting purple eye shadow, I think she's fucking nuts. She annoys me, and as much as I didn't like Jill or Kelly, I hate that they are gone and Ramona is still here.

HOWEVER...the fact that Jill is gone means we no longer have to hear her say, "Ramon-er" because that's how she pronounced her name. Dumb.

Aviva looks like she could be Gretchen Rossi's older sister, no? It kind of creeps me out. They must go to the same plastic surgeon.

What creeps me out more than her face, is her leg. Granted, you would never know by watching her walk, but holy hell when she whipped that thing out to get a pedicure? I almost died.

That shit cray.

I actually caught myself saying, "Wow, LuAnn isn't that annoying this season. Maybe it's because Jill is gone." Then this scene happened, and she did a drive-by shooting in the form of "Ramona is blackmailing me."

Seriously - she should have been wearing a scarf around her head and huge sunglasses. She acted like she was in the middle of a Conspiracy Theory remake.

I wanted to like Heather, I truly did. She wasn't even that annoying until she started to get into it with Ramona. I know, I know, Bravo wants to see the drama - but make it GOOD drama.

She does realize that half the cast was let go because the storyline was boring the hell out of viewers, right?

If she wants to stick around, she's going to have to step her game up.

Sonia annoyed me last season, but I liked her in this episode. She definitely seems off her rocker, but I feel a connection to her because she grew up close to where I live.

Okay, that's a lie. I don't feel a connection to her, I just really want to see her toaster oven brand. If I knew you could get rich by making food in a toaster oven, I would have been loaded by the time I was 8.

 Despite having teeth too large for her mouth, I think Carole is my favorite housewife so far. I also love that she said, "Can you see my tits?" when Aviva started talking about the memoir Carole wrote 7 years ago.

I also like that she doesn't have kids and she hates women that can only talk about their kids.

Sound like someone you know? :)

Please tell me you watch this? Let me know your thoughts.