I'm single.

If you know me well enough, you know that I am in love with Aaron Rodgers. Don't know who he is? He's the quarterback for the Green Bay Packers. Yes, I'm one of those girls who actually likes football.
However, the Giants are my team. Always have been. I never paid much attention to other teams or their players, until I laid eyes on Rodgers...and SWOON...he had my heart. And my lady parts. Too much?

Sunday night, I was faced with this dilemma....


This was a very serious problem. Although I always want the Giants to win, I don't like to see my lover upset. I was still contemplating my future as a Giants fan when this guy showed up on my screen...


WHAT IN THE HELL?! My night went from 7 minutes in heaven to 7 minutes with Ron Jeremy faster than I could blink. And I did blink...a lot...and choked on my Talenti.

Now, I love him with facial hair. LOVE the scruffy look. In fact, I don't like him as much when he's clean shaven. But this?! This is unacceptable. This is NOT a good look...for anyone.

I don't care if it's for charity. I don't care that I don't actually know him.
I don't care that he may or may not be engaged to a girl named DESTINY.

Ugh, get a real name you effing skank...

That 'stache just ruined everything for me. And until I get this man back...


...I'm single.