What I'm about to say isn't something I'm proud of. It's just a fact.
Every guy I've ever dated has come back when all was said and done and apologized, in one way or another, for what happened. Sometimes they said they missed me and wished things were different. Sometimes they just said they were sorry.
Even the guy I dated last year-- the one I would never expect to, not in a million years.
What I've realized about these men is this: their apologies weren't so much for me, but for themselves. They didn't necessarily feel bad that I was hurting, but rather, they wanted to stop feeling guilty for hurting me and thought an apology text would clear the air.
The unapologetic apology text.
Or so it feels.
A few weeks ago a good friend of my went out on a first date with a guy she met online. They had drinks, they kissed, they planned to see each other again. And then poof, he was gone.
She did a little digging and come to find out, he had recently broken up with his ex-girlfriend. I said, "Give it three weeks. He'll text you when they are fighting again."
Last night, he texted her.
I don't want to be right about his reasoning for showing back up, but I can't help but wonder if I am.
And that got me thinking...
I've jokingly said that my bad luck with dating has to lead to something good. It can't all be for nothing. So, I need your help. I want to talk to you about your dating stories-- the good, the bad, the everything in between. Let's talk about the guy who stood you up. Or the one who chased after you relentlessly. Or the one you thought would be The One until he wasn't.
This isn't about throwing ourselves a massive pity party or trying to analyze everything that went wrong so we can pinpoint the exact moment their feelings changed. We're not going to be playing the victims here, okay? This about sharing our stories and what we've learned from the men we've dated.
Do you have 20 minutes to spare? Do you mind if I record our conversation? I'm looking to talk with people over the course of the next couple of months, and compile everything into a yet to be named podcast. Or a podcast mini-series. Or something of the like.
And I know...I know a lot of my faithful readers are married or happily settled down. And what I'm asking you ladies to do is #1: hug your husband or boyfriend tight and thank the good lord you found him and then #2 immediately think of one of your single friends and send her my way. I want to talk to her!
Shoot me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org if you're interested in participating or know someone who is. I can't wait to hear from you.